We don't want to die but we don't want to join in with the living either. We get to the point that we just want to retire from the world of the living.
There is a place inside all of us which is a very dark and lonely place and they haven't see it because if they had, they would know it and understand what your talking about and wouldn't make light of your feelings. The more we tell them they don't quite have the picture, the more they say "Oh sure we do. When you try to discuss this with others, they either respond to you as if you were discussing something as meaningless as having a splinter in your finger OR they claim they have the same feelings, as if we are talking about something measureable, like arthritis. We are, or at least were, compassionate and empathetic towards people but that is disappearing at a rapid rate. Sensitive people who live in the world of reality. I take that to mean that we have easy access to our feelings. I believe we are what is referred to as "Sensitive" people (something I consider a good quality, while the general public consider it a weakness). If fact, I probably couldn't have worded it any better. For what it's worth, I understand exactly how you feel. And I realize it's over a year and a half old, but I felt the need to reply to it and I can only hope you don't mind. This reply is addressing the personal side of your comment as opposed to the song. Just because the lyrics say one thing doesn't mean they don't mean something else. The beauty about most music and especially Alice in Chains songs is that you can interpret them any way. So that is pretty much the meaning of the song to me. And if I decide to make a major life change she will be there to support me 100%. The final verse: "You my friend, I will defend, and if we change well I love you any way." To me this is kind of like my wife speaking to me, I feel like she is the only person who really understands how I feel and what I'm going through. There is a George Carlin joke that represents this well: "You hate your job? There's a support group for that, its called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar." I don't think its funny. But I feel like I'm more in touch with my inner being than most people are with themselves and am able to understand how I feel and the severity of it better than others. When I try to talk to anyone about it I get no sympathy, its almost a joke to people because supposedly everyone is like me.
Enough so that I'm emotionally and spiritually drained and becoming depressed. "Its ok, had a bad day, hands are bruised from breaking rocks all day." "Drained and blue, I bleed for you, you think its funny but you're drowning in it too." I work hard day in and day out to earn my keep and I don't like it, I despise it and I am miserable doing it. To me excuses there are no excuses other than the fact that life is cruel and there is no escaping it. The chorus: "Everyday something hits me all so cold, find me sitting by myself, no excuses that I know" It seems to me that every day its just blow after blow by people who don't care about me and it has driven me into my own little private world. I'm blatantly obvious with them even if it is rude or something. But I've been gradually been being more frank with people when I do interact with them, no more sugar coating things or telling them what they want to hear. Recently I've been hiding and keeping to myself, not really talking to people or interacting unless I have to. Then: "Laying low, want to take it slow, no more hiding or disguising truths I've sold". To me and in my situation, it represents my increasingly antisocial attitude and how I find it difficult to find the better qualities in people. In the first verse, it goes "Its alright, there comes a time, got no patience to search for peace of mind". To get a more indepth interpretation, read on. I dream that I might one day pull out of this and make something better for myself. A lot of people kind of laugh at my feelings and tell me "you and everyone else buddy!" but I take it more seriously and I feel that I am not blind to it like they are. I'm not happy with where I live or what I do and I've become incredibly reclusive and introverted and have sunk into a bit of a depression and have lots of problems with anxiety. I hate my job with a passion, and for the most part I hate a lot of my life. Whether its about drugs or about Cantrell giving Staley a message to quit drugs, here's what it means to me:
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